consciousness backed up with little theory

Architecture & the Visual Arts        –        MA Interior Design AR7045
Assessment Marking & Feedback Sheet ­ STUDENT

Ambika KATTA

First Mark

Miho Nakagawa

MARK

 

Learning Outcomes/ Assessment Criteria

 

At the end of the module the student will be able to:

0-49

%

 

 

 

50-59

 

 

60-69 70+
1. Interrelate conceptual, theoretical and practical tools and methods.

 

2. Understand the relationship between theory, strategy and design and communicate this in a professional and rigorous way.

 

No evidence or very little evidence of critical reading and understanding of the selected topic.

 

Limited new knowledge has been acquired.

 

The arguments presented lack clarity.

Has demonstrated evidence of some critical reading and understanding of the selected topic.

 

New knowledge has been acquired.

 

The knowledge and critical arguments are communicated fairly clearly.

Has demonstrated evidence of critical reading and understanding of the selected topic.

 

Significant new knowledge has been acquired.

 

The knowledge and critical arguments are communicated with clarity.

Has demonstrated evidence of extended critical reading and understanding of the selected topic.

 

Significant and broad new knowledge has been acquired.

 

Extended knowledge and critical arguments are communicated with clarity.

3. Demonstrate critical reflection on social/ cultural/ economic/ technical knowledge and its integration into design processes and professional life.

 

4. Synthesise the ideas presented within studies, texts or other learning materials.

 

5. Construct and demonstrate clear, well defended argument using a range of media and approaches

 

The student has not critically demonstrated the relationship between the different sources/ references consulted.

 

The synthesis of ideas is limited and does not create new paths of thought or new knowledge.

 

The essay does not present a very clear research question. The overall argument is not communicated with clarity.

The student has attempted to demonstrate critically the relationship between the different sources/ references consulted.

 

The synthesis of ideas, creates, to a certain extent, some new paths of thought or new knowledge.

 

The essay presents the main research question and an overall argument with clarity.

 

The student has demonstrated critically the relationship between the different sources/ references consulted, in a successful way.

 

The synthesis of ideas, creates some new paths of thought and/or new knowledge.

 

The essay presents a clear research question and a strong overall argument with clarity.

 

The student has demonstrated critically the relationship between the different sources/ references consulted, in an outstanding way.

 

The synthesis of ideas, creates new paths of thought and new knowledge.

 

The essay presents a clear and well framed research question and a very strong overall argument with clarity.

 

 

Feedback

 

We found this thesis difficult to read as it is a stream of consciousness backed up with little theory. Your thesis is a little information oriented without your own perspectives and critical reflection on the sources you read. You needed to compose the knowledge you gained in a unique and rigorous way. You needed to put forward your well-informed opinions and interpretations by developing a coherent argument.

Some primary research was expected by exploring how poems, art forms, calligraphies, mythologies and so on have influenced Islamic perception of colours.

The reason for choosing this topic, including your fascinating experiences in Golconda Fort, could have been included somewhere in this thesis.

There are some basic misunderstandings concerning citations which can be avoided by using proof-reading service provided by the study centre in the library. Please make use of the UEL ‘Skills Zone’ to get some support with academic writing.

In the Case Study section, a contemporary mosque or mosques could be useful to develop further argument about colour and light in Islamic Architecture. Your case studies always need a plan and section.

The thesis structure needs to be more precise and better organised. The thesis should be demonstrating critical thinking and analytical skills. Your abstract, introduction and conclusion need to be improved.

1&2) You have deleted necessary citations in the submitted thesis. All the information obtained from somewhere needs to be acknowledged. But the same citation continues next sentence, you could only use the one placed at the later sentence. Please recover necessary citations. As you used the same journal papers many times, I recommended you look for or look at these papers’ original sources to avoid plagiarism of ideas. When you exchange the same citation into their original sources, please add these originals in your Bibliography, too. Please use proof-reading service provided by the study centre in the library before resubmission.

 

(3&7) As the thesis topic is too huge, I recommend you reconsider case studies. Could you choose either “(Islamic) Mosques” or “Islamic Rulers’ residences”? However, seeing the later part of your thesis about light and colours, I think “Mosques” seem to be more appropriate. If you choose Mosques, your thesis title could be “The Significance of Colour in Old and Contemporary Mosques”. If so, I recommend you add a contemporary mosque’s interior designs as a new case study. Google “contemporary mosque interior design” and select a specific mosque which can support your section about light and colour. Please look at some architectural online magazines such as ArchiDaily, Dezeen, Architizer and so on, and check if your chosen contemporary mosque’s information is available as its detailed information (interior photos and/or drawings) is required. If only one online magazine covers your chosen mosque, that may be not enough for your case study.

 

You need to add why you specifically use Goharshad Mosque and the contemporary mosque for your case studies. Your specific reasons are very important.

 

Golconda Fort should be replaced immediately after Introduction, giving a section titled, “Background of my thesis”. You are required to explain why you are interested in colours in Islamic architecture. You could say, seeing Golconda Fort without colours, you are interested in various colours used in Islamic architecture. If you move Golconda Fort to the Background of the thesis, its information needs to be minimum, summarised from the current text.

 

(4) The thesis structure needs to be revised. You could add “Background of my thesis” after Introduction and Case studies section needs to be moved to before Conclusion.

 

(5) To add more appropriate figures, including interior photographs, plans and sections, in particular in the case studies section.

 

(6) By revising Introduction, please include thesis question and aim(s).

 

 

You refer to the colour wheel, but it is not really clear what one gets out of it. At some point you refer to colour blue and it seems that you call it a warm colour, which is no true. There seems to be some confusion there.

 

 

You refer to the turquoise colour, as the most significant one in Islam. This is a very interesting point, and you could focus more on this. This could give a more clear focus to your essay. Maybe you could focus more on this specific colour in Islam. Why is it important? Who says so? When did this conversation first start? In what context?

How was the specific pigment sourced?

With what metaphors was the colour associated? Examples …?

You could select a focused series of case studies, study then in a lot more depth, and maybe through a more specific a clear angle. (i.e. focusing on how this specific colour is used)

 

You introductory sections include too many generalisations that are not well justified. Avoid making this type of very general arguments.

 

 

Revise the structure, content, referencing of your essay and then book an appointment with Skills Zone for further advice.